Chickboy, chicks and chikinini

PERRYSCOPE
Perry Diaz

Within a week, President Beningo “P-Noy” Aquino III’s love life has dominated the “chizmis” crowd after it was revealed that he broke up with his girlfriend, Shalani Soledad. Indeed, three young “chicks” – Trish, Barbie, and Liz — were rumored to having a love affair with P-Noy. If that were true, P-Noy would qualify as a playboy or “chickboy.” Yup! And I wouldn’t be surprised if some “chizmosas” would swear that they have seen P-Noy with a “chikinini” (hickey). Hmm… Makes one wonder if that “chikinini” was the cause of his breakup with Shalani.

Meanwhile, Shalani denies the “chizmis” that she has been dating the Mayor of Valenzuela. Hey, it’s a free country. Besides, the Mayor is younger than P-Noy. As some women would say, “Age really matters.” Looking at the pictures of his young “chicks,” P-Noy seems to agree as well.

While P-Noy can get rid of any of his “chicks” like flicking a cigarette butt into the trash can, he’s stuck to his longtime friend, mentor, and “shooting buddy,” Rico E. Puno. A lot of people have advised P-Noy to fire Rico as Undersecretary of the Department of the Interior and Local Government (DILG) for complicity in the August 23 bloody hostage-taking crisis and the jueteng payola scandal in which he was alleged to be receiving P8 million a month from jueteng lords.

“No way,” says P-Noy. Unlike his expendable “chicks,” Rico is indispensible and untouchable. Reminds me of England’s King Edward VIII who gave up his crown for the love of a divorcee. Hey, that’s what true love – or in the case of P-Noy, true friendship — is all about.

Latest Manila sport… After P-Noy split with Shalani, there’s a new sport in Manila called “Spot-Noy-on-a-date.” It started when P-Noy was seen at Nuvo Restaurant and Wine Bar with a pretty young woman who was rumored to be Barbie Palagos. But Nuvo’s manager claimed that it was not Barbie,
“The Barbie Palagos seen with the President that night was not the same woman in Facebook. The Barbie in Facebook was younger than the one who dated Mr. Aquino, and she was 25 to 27 years old.” Hey, does it matter whether it’s Barbie or not as long as P-Noy is satisfied with his date?

“Satisfaction” survey… In the recent Social Weather Stations (SWS) “satisfaction” survey conducted from September 24-27, 2010, the National Administration of P-Noy took a beating when 41% of the respondents said they were dissatisfied with his National Administration, particularly on the issue of “Resolving the hostage-taking of Senior Inspector Rolando Mendoza,” while 36% said they’re satisfied and 21% were undecided.

Perhaps, it’s time for P-Noy to let go of his “shooting buddy” and concentrate on his “chicks.” “No way!” Oops, sorry… I forgot, untouchable pala si Rico.

P-Noy’s whipping boy… Poor Prisco Nilo, P-Noy fired him two months ago as weather bureau chief for providing him with wrong weather forecast. Sad to say, P-Noy is still whipping Nilo today. He said that Nilo is “not owning up to his mistakes during his watch.” Come on Mr. President, Nilo’s mistake did not cause people to die while the incompetence of your “shooting buddy” may have contributed to the death of eight Chinese tourists.

Wasted American taxpayers’ money… A news report says, “The United States government has allotted more than $1.5 million worth of training and equipment assistance for the Philippine National Police (PNP) in order to improve the organization’s anti-kidnapping and hostage negotiation capability following the August 23 hostage fiasco in Manila.” What a waste of American taxpayers’ money. All P-Noy had to do was fire his “shooting buddy” and appoint a qualified and competent Undersecretary to oversee the PNP.

New Jueteng guidelines… A news report says, “The Philippine Charity Sweepstakes Office (PCSO) sent Friday the new guidelines on the controversial Small Town Lottery (STL) to Malacañang to inform President Aquino on the steps being crafted by the PCSO as a campaign against ‘jueteng.’ PCSO chairperson Margie P. Juico said she believes it is better the new STL guidelines to get the approval of Malacañang before they are finalized and implemented.” I wouldn’t be surprised if P-Noy would ask his “shooting buddy” to “review and revise” the new jueteng guidelines. Who knows, his “shooting buddy” might have some vested interest in it.
By the way, jueteng whistleblower Sandra Cam revealed a few weeks ago that certain PCSO officials were getting mini-Cooper cars from Pampanga jueteng lords. Is that all they’re getting? Heck, the Pampanga jueteng operations are generating P33 million a day! And all they’re getting are those funny looking midget cars?

Gloria junketing to South Korea… A news report says, “Former President and now Pampanga 2nd district Rep. Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo will lead allies from Pampanga in a 6-day trip to South Korea. Arroyo will be joined in her trip by her political ally, Pampanga Gov. Lilia Pineda. Pineda and her husband, Rodolfo ‘Bong’ Pineda, were recently invited to a Senate inquiry on jueteng after being accused of being jueteng operators in Pampanga.”

Hmm… Don’t be surprised if the South Koreans will start jueteng in their country pretty soon. Yup, it looks like La Cuarta Nostra is going international, folks. Like they say in Juetengland, “Cuarta na! Cuarta na!”

By the way, Gov. Lilia Pineda insists she is not a “jueteng lord.” Yup, she’s right. She’s not a “jueteng lord,” she’s a “jueteng queen.”

Dyok of the Week… A news report says, “Interior Secretary Jesse Robredo on Thursday assured that it has been clear with Rico Puno, a shooting buddy of President Benigno Aquino III, that he is not the boss in the Department of the Interior and Local Government (DILG).” Robredo said, “I’m Rico Puno’s boss.” Hehehe… (PerryDiaz@gmail.com)