Ifugao culture: Root of violence against women and children

THOUGHTS UNLIMITED
Eugene Mariano Balitang
(2nd of two parts)

Our cultural treatment and perception of women and children had metamorphosed in today’s modern world into something else—violence! As our women now are being empowered and the modern world’s concept of equality between men and women is slowly seeping in our in our society’s consciousness, the cultural tradition of male superiority is desperately grabbing a foothold and making a stand—the result is violence.

Unable now to keep their women in the kitchen, husbands resort to all forms of violence just to assert their cultural concept of manhood. Children are now vocal in their ideas and opinions, in voicing out their feelings and thoughts! And when the children are not being heard, or they feel they are not a part of the family, the tendency is for them to express their feelings in wanton and destructive outlets—cigarettes, alcohol, drugs; their unmet need to be loved and be part of the family is temporarily solved by their peers and barkada—later on, dating, pre-marital sex then teenage pregnancy!

Another culture I like to touch on is our perception of SEX. This is not about mere gender, but about the differences between a boy and a girl who would both eventually become man and woman—and eventually enjoy sex! Take note—sex is enjoyable (unless you haven’t experienced it yet) and is actually a gift from the Lord—the first gift He gave Adam and Eve after marrying them—then children came later.

While the subject of sex, be it the process of growing up or the intercourse itself, is a natural part of our life cycle and is innate in our being humans, talking about this matter openly (even between husband and wife) is often considered taboo in Ifugao culture.

The tendency therefore is that children growing into adolescence have no one to express their fears and to ask their questions about the sudden changes in their physical attributes. Parents do not discuss these matters to their children since it is agagaiho (taboo) or mapaniyo (sacred).

Thus, the children are left to discuss their sexuality among themselves—it’s a case of the blind leading another blind. And in discussing sex among themselves, adolescents often end up “discovering” the joys of the act among themselves—and although they are ready to enjoy the blissful act, these kids are not ready to take on the consequences and the responsibility that comes after the “discovery.”
How many parents openly discuss circumcision with their sons and menstruations with their daughters? And yet, these are basic topics on sex. And since the role of the Ifugao woman is summed up in her bearing sons for the ricefields and for the war, her feelings about sex is often not important. As to whether she enjoys intercourse is a secondary issue to her ability to give birth. And for as long as the husband enjoys the wife whenever he wants to, that is regarded as good sex!

This Ifugao perception that open discussion of sex is taboo is often our frustration in court whenever we are prosecuting sexual offenses; albeit this is advantageous if you are defending the accused. Oftentimes, victims of sexual abuses cannot openly talk about what happened to them. Even on direct examination, they cannot tell their story—and I know that this is more due to the shame and the guilt brought about by the way they were raised concerning the subject on sex—for the victim, it is a shame to talk openly (especially to strangers) about your genitalia or sex, for that matter.

Thus, in a relentless cross-examination, the victim’s testimony will almost always crumble into pieces. Even adult women who are victims of rape cannot even tell the story of their ordeal, so how much more for a child-victim. In fact, due to this perceived taboo of discussing sex openly, family members always try to hush the victim. Sexual abuses go unreported because the involved families always settle matter amicably among themselves (often times without considering the feelings and thoughts of the victim).

These are but a few of our cultural psyche and collective perception in Ifugao that I believe contributes to the culture of violence against women and children that are now proscribed under RA 9262. Of course, I hope it’s only my opinion. – ebalitang@yahoo.com.ph