Fear versus fear

 TRUTH FOR TODAY

Jun Malazo

A pandemic of panic has stricken the world.  The rapidly-increasing statistics pumped to us via news outlets and social media are creating unprecedented fear in our entire world.  What is it that people are truly afraid of?  Are we afraid of the COVID-19 or is there something bigger that we are afraid of?

As of March 18, 2020 at 8:13:26 p.m. local time in Baltimore, Maryland, U.S., the COVID-19 has been confirmed to have infected 218,743 people worldwide.  The illness has had a 38.4% recovery rate and a mortality rate of 4%, with the death toll hitting 8,810 people across the world.  The acknowledged start date, cited from arcgis.com of John Hopkins University, is November 17, 2019. 

Based upon this data, the death rate is an average of 2,202.5 people per month.  If the death rate were to remain steady, the annual death rate due to the COVID-19 would be 23,862 people.  If the death rate were to immediately double, the death toll would be 37,445.5 by the end of a one-year span. I understand that we cannot project the future of this virus, but considering other communicable illnesses can help us to put things into perspective. 

We will consider the annual world-wide statistics for tuberculosis, second-hand smoke, HIV and AIDS, and the common flu (influenza).  Tuberculosis is one of the top “killers” in the world.  According to the World Health Organization (WHO) website, who.net, regarding tuberculosis, “A total of 1.5 million people died from TB in 2018. . .”  This would be an average of 125,000 per month. 

Second-hand smoke is a communicable disease that seems to have been accepted in many societies.  Once again consulting the respected WHO we find, “Worldwide, more than 600,000 deaths per year are caused by second-hand smoke. . .”  Innocent victims of others’ poor health habits die at 50,000 people per month world-wide.  The global epidemic of AIDS is lessening each year, but according to unaids.org, “In 2018, around 770,000 people died from AIDS-related illness worldwide. . .” 

With around 1.7 million people newly infected around the world each year, the startling death rate of 64,188.7 per month is heart-breaking.  The common flu is something we all encounter.  It is so common we often have what is termed a “flu season.”  In an article from globalresearch.ca, published on February 22, 2020, Tim Clifford states, “The common flu. . . kills up to 650,000 people every year, according to the World Health Organization.”  Considering monthly averages again shows us that 54,166.7 people die globally from the “common flu” each year.  Communicable diseases all have something in common—they are preventable.  With these startling statistics, why aren’t we having a global scare about all of these aforementioned diseases?

Before we attempt to pinpoint what people are truly afraid of, let us consider what “fear” is.  According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary online, the word “fear” as a noun has four definitions.  For the purpose of this article we will consider definitions number one and number four.  Definition one states that fear is: “an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger.” 

Definition four defines fear as: “profound reverence and awe especially toward God.”  Interestingly, while listed as definitions for the same word, each type of “fear” produces different results.  Consider what you are fearing as we contrast these two types of fear. 

Many of us have experienced “an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger.”  Each day there are things that alarm or startle us, make us feel anxious, or absolutely terrify us.  Fear controls our emotions and, many times, even our actions. Fear can be crippling to the point that we cannot even move our bodies.  Fear can be so overwhelming in our emotions that we may sob uncontrollably or sometimes even go hysterical.  Fear drives some to react in anger or violence. 

Fear often causes us to do things we would not normally do if we were thinking rationally.  Fear drives people to make foolish choices that they later regret.  Fear causes people to make rash financial decisions which drive them to poverty.  Fear causes us to doubt things we otherwise know are absolutely true.  Constant fear distresses the mental, emotional, and physical being of a person even causing death. Fear keeps us in bondage to constantly suffer bad or what the Bible calls “evil” things.

If we have a “profound reverence and awe especially toward God”, we are set free from suffering these evil things.  The Bible tells us in Proverbs 14:26, “In the fear of the LORD is strong confidence: and his children shall have a place of refuge.”  How can the word “fear’’ appear in the same sentence as “confidence’’ and “refuge’’?  A more thorough definition of “fear”, as pertaining to the fear of God, can be seen in the Webster’s 1828 Dictionary:

In scripture, fear is used to express a filial or a slavish passion.  In good men, the fear of God is a holy awe or reverence of God and his laws, which springs from a just view and real love of the divine character, leading the subjects of it to hate and shun every thing that can offend such a holy being, and inclining them to aim at perfect obedience.  This is filial fear.  Slavish fear is the effect or consequence of guilt; it is the painful apprehension of merited punishment.

Those whose lives are being lived in rebellion to God may not even realize it, but they have the “slavish fear” of God.  They are always waiting for Him to give them the punishment they deserve for their wicked deeds.  Those who have come to a true personal relationship with God and are living their lives in “filial fear” as defined here; can live in freedom from fear as we commonly understand it.  Those who live in this filial fear have been given many promises from God that can bring them peace in the midst of even the most tumultuous of times.

The phrase “the fear of the LORD” which we saw in Proverbs 14:26, appears in the Bible thirty times—twenty-eight times it is “the fear of the LORD” while two times it is “the fear of the Lord.”  Isaiah 33:6 tells us that the fear of the LORD is a treasure.  “. . . the fear of the LORD is his treasure.”  Before we can completely understand why fearing God, who is called by his name LORD in these phrases, can be a treasure and bring freedom, it is important to understand the meaning of His name “LORD.”

In the Bible, two of God’s names are “LORD” and “Lord.”  On the surface this may only seem like a capitalization difference, but it is far more.  These are two different names speaking of two different attributes of God.  Looking at the original languages in which the Bible was written, the name translated as “LORD” is “Yahweh” or “Jehovah.”  This name shows us that God is “the Self-existent or eternal.”  His name “Lord” comes from the name “Adonai” which means “sovereign, controller.”  Let us see what God, the LORD, promises to those who fear Him:

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: a good understanding have all they that do his commandments:  his praise endureth for ever.  (Psalm 111:10)

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge:  but fools despise wisdom and instruction.  (Proverbs 1:7)

In the fear of the LORD is strong confidence: and his children shall have a place of refuge.  (Proverbs 14:26)

The fear of the LORD tendeth to life: and he that hath it shall abide satisfied: he shall not be visited with evil.  (Proverbs 19:23)

These promises given by the self-existent, eternal God, the LORD, are directly opposite to what  we experience when we have the fear of evil things.  Psalm 37:3 tells us to “Trust in the LORD….”  Psalm 37 is full of promises to those who will trust in the LORD.  Verse nineteen says, “They shall not be ashamed in the evil time:  and in the days of famine they shall be satisfied.”  In this verse the word “ashamed” means “to pale (become pale in one’s face from shock or fear) or to be disappointed”. 

The word “evil” means “adversity, affliction, bad, calamity.”  The word “satisfied” means “to be full of” or “to have plenty of.”  So, when we live trusting and fearing  the LORD we do not have to suffer shock or fear when times are bad and full of adversity and calamity.  God promises that He will be the One that will be sure that we are satisfied to the full and have plenty of what we need.

Let us consider Isaiah 33:6 once again:  “And wisdom and knowledge shall be the stability of thy times, and strength of salvation:  the fear of the LORD is his treasure.”  God promised to those who fear the LORD, “stability of times.”  How can He promise this when times certainly appear to be unstable all around the world?  Our stability comes from within.  While things can be crashing down all about us, we can be stable and not fear these unstable times.  Obviously the wisdom and knowledge of man are not creating stability in our world or our minds.  This is because it is the fear of the LORD that is the beginning of true wisdom and knowledge. 

As we come to understand what we fear, we understand how it affects our minds and our lives.  The fear of evil, bad, or calamity—which in our current world is the COVID-19—only promises to continue to torture us.  Thus, I would like to revisit one of my original questions: What is it that people are truly afraid of?  It is not the COVID-19 that people are afraid of—it is death. 

People are afraid to die.  Why are people afraid to die?  It is because countless people in the world do not know what they will face after death.  They do not live in the fear of the LORD, they live in the fear of death, which was brought into our world by the devil.  The Bible calls the devil “the prince of the power of the air.”  He is masterful at scaring and deceiving people.  Those who live in the fear of the LORD are not afraid of the devil, or his work, or even of death.

Jesus, the Son of God, died to conquer the devil, death, and sin.  Speaking of Jesus, the Bible tells us in Hebrews 10:12,13, “But this man, after he had offered one sacrifice for sins for ever, sat down on the right hand of God;  From henceforth expecting till his enemies be made his footstool.”  Once again speaking of Jesus, the Bible says, “And you, being dead in your sins…hath he quickened [made alive] together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses [sin]”.

Those who have accepted the death of Jesus on the cross as the sole, complete payment for their sin do not have to fear death.  You can be absolutely sure that when you face eternity you will definitely live with God forever in Heaven.  John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”  Those belonging to Jesus, living in the fear of the LORD, need not even fear the present turmoil for God promises, “In the fear of the LORD is strong confidence:  and his children shall have a place of refuge” (Proverbs 14:26).  What or who do you choose to fear?  May I encourage you to choose to live in the fear of the LORD—the self-existent, sovereign controller of all—and receive the many wonderful treasures He promises to you.

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How to win a child’s heart

TRUTH FOR TODAY

Jun Malazo

"My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways."  (Proverbs 23:26, KJV)

One of the greatest and most tragic mistakes that parents make in child rearing is to attempt to  nurture their children without winning their hearts.  Children can be trained to follow rules, but external conformity will not last.  I have witnessed far too many cases where families break apart because of children that rebelled against their parents after reaching their adolescent years.  The main reason is because the parents never were able to win the hearts of their children.

Winning a child’s heart is paramount if parents expect their children to continue to obey and respect them.  Solomon, the wisest man that has ever lived in the Bible, believed that if he were to properly train his sons, he must win their hearts first.  I believe that Solomon understood that rebellion in children is not always seen in an open retaliation against parental authority.  Children’s rebellion can also be very subtle and quiet.  I believe the latter is more serious because it is indicative of a child’s heart that is not given to the parents.

Rules are important, and we must make sure that they are consistently enforced in our homes.  However, while diligently enforcing the rules, we must also nurture a relationship with our children.  Someone once wisely said, “Rules without relationship breed rebellion.” 

Parents that have won their children’s hearts have essentially won their trust.  There are many times that parents must protect the minds of their children especially at a very young age.  Part of this protection sometimes means setting a rule without having to explain the intricate details about certain areas of life.  When my boys were little, I warned them about the different vices that people fall prey to.  However, in order to protect their minds, I did not give a detailed documentary of the dangers of drugs and the type of lifestyle they lead to.  I just needed them to trust me.

Winning the hearts of children does not just happen during times when we have heart-to-heart talks with them.  Winning their hearts usually happens while they observe our daily living.  Our actions and reactions to everyday life situations are what will win the hearts of our children.  Also, our relationship with our spouse bears a heavy weight in our attempt to win the hearts of our children.  This is why most children of separated parents often have a harder time in their lives.

Children’s hearts are fragile.  Coming from a secular child psychology philosophy, Dr. John J. MacGee the following has been said about the delicateness of a child’s heart:

All children are like flowers. They need to be nurtured with great care. They are delicate and need our full attentions until their roots are deep and strong. The main nurturing that we do is to teach our little ones to feel safe with us and loved by us. As they grow in body and spirit, we then teach them to feel engaged with us and loving toward us and others. Without realizing it, parents and teachers generally give this nurturing, teach these life-lessons, and help children flourish. It is an instinctive act. It is an act of our hearts.

There are many ways that parents can win the heart of their child.  First, we must be an engaged parent.  When children are neglected and are left in their own worlds, they feel unloved and unworthy.  Being an engaged parent takes work to be actively involved in the lives of our children. 

Too often, parents feel bothered when their young children desire to just talk to them about what happened at school or when they want to show them an art project they’ve worked on at home or at school.  I understand that as a father we carry much of the burden of our family, so in turn our minds are often disengaged with our children. 

However, our children need our undivided attention.  They must feel loved by us.  The amazing discovery that I have made my own life is that my children’s demands for my attention do not really take much time at all.  I have found that when my children are little they just want to see if they are important enough for me to stop what I’m doing to listen to them.

Secondly, we can win our children’s hearts by showing them patience and love.  Carnal criticism breeds bitterness and anger in our children.  In Christian Parenting 13, a writer said the following:

Parents must be very patient and kind with their children. They are delicate. We must have rules and the rules must be enforced and there must be discipline, but we must never forget that they are children and that learning godly character habits and spiritual growth does not happen overnight. It is a long process. The parents must not forget the long and probably arduous process it took them to get where they are.

This is especially important for parents to understand because if we are not careful, our criticism can wound the spirit of our children.  Children often keep their wounded spirits all the way even up to adulthood.  Pastor Troy Dorrell said the following in the article he wrote entitled, “Healing A Wounded Spirit”:

In many homes, parents and their teenagers may not experience a close relationship in part because of an offense that created an injured spirit, which in turn creates distance. Most of us understand that dynamic in our marital relationships; hurt results in distance and loss of closeness. The problem with teens is that they often do not articulate their hurt. They often just keep it inside and little by little allow their hearts to be moved far away from our own, until one day rebellion, resentment, or indifference has taken hold.

Pastor Dorrell continues to offer a solution by saying the following from the same article:

The answer to this dilemma is simple but not always easy. When you know your child has a wounded spirit because of something you have done; discuss it, address it, and if necessary apologize for your part in their hurt. Too often pride and fear keep parents from being real and asking for forgiveness for poor choices or attitudes. Your esteem in their eyes will only increase if you admit it when you are wrong.

Lastly, parents win the hearts of the children by taking time for heart-to-heart communication and involvement.  The absence of close communication and involvement between parents and children destroys the type of closeness that God intended for a parent/child relationship.  Notice what a parent said about this topic:

I believe that parents can reach the hearts of their children by having a relationship with them. That is, after all, how God reaches us and gets our hearts for Him. Parents in today's society have too little time for their children. Even when kids are homeschooled, my experience is that the majority of the homeschooled kids are teaching themselves.

My nine-year-old son is always coming up to me and asking to do something with me. Now, I can't always, but if I never took the time to say, 'Ok, let's sit down and play a game,' then he would want nothing to do with me because he would see that I want nothing to do with him. We must make time to put down what we are doing and sit down with the kids. We parents have to take the time to raise our children. That means spending time with them in God's Word and out of God's Word.

In closing, our role as parents is not just to modify the behavior of our children.  We are to nurture their hearts towards loving God and others.  This happens everyday as we fully engage ourselves in being the kind of parents that God wants us to be. 

Read more...

How to win a child’s heart

TRUTH FOR TODAY

Jun Malazo

"My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways."  (Proverbs 23:26, KJV)

One of the greatest and most tragic mistakes that parents make in child rearing is to attempt to  nurture their children without winning their hearts.  Children can be trained to follow rules, but external conformity will not last.  I have witnessed far too many cases where families break apart because of children that rebelled against their parents after reaching their adolescent years.  The main reason is because the parents never were able to win the hearts of their children.

Winning a child’s heart is paramount if parents expect their children to continue to obey and respect them.  Solomon, the wisest man that has ever lived in the Bible, believed that if he were to properly train his sons, he must win their hearts first.  I believe that Solomon understood that rebellion in children is not always seen in an open retaliation against parental authority.  Children’s rebellion can also be very subtle and quiet.  I believe the latter is more serious because it is indicative of a child’s heart that is not given to the parents.

Rules are important, and we must make sure that they are consistently enforced in our homes.  However, while diligently enforcing the rules, we must also nurture a relationship with our children.  Someone once wisely said, “Rules without relationship breed rebellion.” 

Parents that have won their children’s hearts have essentially won their trust.  There are many times that parents must protect the minds of their children especially at a very young age.  Part of this protection sometimes means setting a rule without having to explain the intricate details about certain areas of life.  When my boys were little, I warned them about the different vices that people fall prey to.  However, in order to protect their minds, I did not give a detailed documentary of the dangers of drugs and the type of lifestyle they lead to.  I just needed them to trust me.

Winning the hearts of children does not just happen during times when we have heart-to-heart talks with them.  Winning their hearts usually happens while they observe our daily living.  Our actions and reactions to everyday life situations are what will win the hearts of our children.  Also, our relationship with our spouse bears a heavy weight in our attempt to win the hearts of our children.  This is why most children of separated parents often have a harder time in their lives.

Children’s hearts are fragile.  Coming from a secular child psychology philosophy, Dr. John J. MacGee the following has been said about the delicateness of a child’s heart:

All children are like flowers. They need to be nurtured with great care. They are delicate and need our full attentions until their roots are deep and strong. The main nurturing that we do is to teach our little ones to feel safe with us and loved by us. As they grow in body and spirit, we then teach them to feel engaged with us and loving toward us and others. Without realizing it, parents and teachers generally give this nurturing, teach these life-lessons, and help children flourish. It is an instinctive act. It is an act of our hearts.

There are many ways that parents can win the heart of their child.  First, we must be an engaged parent.  When children are neglected and are left in their own worlds, they feel unloved and unworthy.  Being an engaged parent takes work to be actively involved in the lives of our children. 

Too often, parents feel bothered when their young children desire to just talk to them about what happened at school or when they want to show them an art project they’ve worked on at home or at school.  I understand that as a father we carry much of the burden of our family, so in turn our minds are often disengaged with our children. 

However, our children need our undivided attention.  They must feel loved by us.  The amazing discovery that I have made my own life is that my children’s demands for my attention do not really take much time at all.  I have found that when my children are little they just want to see if they are important enough for me to stop what I’m doing to listen to them.

Secondly, we can win our children’s hearts by showing them patience and love.  Carnal criticism breeds bitterness and anger in our children.  In Christian Parenting 13, a writer said the following:

Parents must be very patient and kind with their children. They are delicate. We must have rules and the rules must be enforced and there must be discipline, but we must never forget that they are children and that learning godly character habits and spiritual growth does not happen overnight. It is a long process. The parents must not forget the long and probably arduous process it took them to get where they are.

This is especially important for parents to understand because if we are not careful, our criticism can wound the spirit of our children.  Children often keep their wounded spirits all the way even up to adulthood.  Pastor Troy Dorrell said the following in the article he wrote entitled, “Healing A Wounded Spirit”:

In many homes, parents and their teenagers may not experience a close relationship in part because of an offense that created an injured spirit, which in turn creates distance. Most of us understand that dynamic in our marital relationships; hurt results in distance and loss of closeness. The problem with teens is that they often do not articulate their hurt. They often just keep it inside and little by little allow their hearts to be moved far away from our own, until one day rebellion, resentment, or indifference has taken hold.

Pastor Dorrell continues to offer a solution by saying the following from the same article:

The answer to this dilemma is simple but not always easy. When you know your child has a wounded spirit because of something you have done; discuss it, address it, and if necessary apologize for your part in their hurt. Too often pride and fear keep parents from being real and asking for forgiveness for poor choices or attitudes. Your esteem in their eyes will only increase if you admit it when you are wrong.

Lastly, parents win the hearts of the children by taking time for heart-to-heart communication and involvement.  The absence of close communication and involvement between parents and children destroys the type of closeness that God intended for a parent/child relationship.  Notice what a parent said about this topic:

             I believe that parents can reach the hearts of their children by having a relationship with them. That is, after all, how God reaches us and gets our hearts for Him. Parents in today's society have too little time for their children. Even when kids are homeschooled, my experience is that the majority of the homeschooled kids are teaching themselves.

My nine-year-old son is always coming up to me and asking to do something with me. Now, I can't always, but if I never took the time to say, 'Ok, let's sit down and play a game,' then he would want nothing to do with me because he would see that I want nothing to do with him. We must make time to put down what we are doing and sit down with the kids. We parents have to take the time to raise our children. That means spending time with them in God's Word and out of God's Word.

In closing, our role as parents is not just to modify the behavior of our children.  We are to nurture their hearts towards loving God and others.  This happens everyday as we fully engage ourselves in being the kind of parents that God wants us to be. 

Read more...

The Power of a parent’s influence

TRUTH FOR TODAY

Jun Malazo

"And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."  (Ephesians 6:4, KJV)

If you are a parent, your influence matters.  Our influence as parents can be both positive and negative.  Our influence matters because it is what our children will carry with them into adulthood.  Our influence in parenting is what our children will most likely imitate in parenting their own children. 

Our influence is more than just from our DNA makeup, though some of our personality traits are replicated in our children.  Our influence is our everyday moment-by-moment training of our children.  It is what our children read through our actions, attitudes, and words.  Much of what we see in children today, whether positive or negative traits, is a direct result of the influence (or the lack thereof) from their parents.  Polls in the recent years indicate that most of the people in jail today grew up without the influence of one or more parents.  When children grow up with a negative or no influence at all the results are devastating.

According to the verse above, parents (especially fathers) are to “nurture” their children.  The word nurture in this verse essentially means “education, training, or disciplinary correction.”  The verse also mentions the word admonition which means “rebuke or warning.”  As a parent our responsibility toward our children is more than just providing a roof over their heads and food on the table.  Our main responsibility is to shape their character by constant guidance through training and instruction coupled with loving disciplinary correction. 

It is not an easy task, but it is possible.  This requires active involvement in the lives of our children.  There’s a difference between proactive parenting and passive parenting.  A proactive parent is the one that will show genuine interest in the life of their child.  This is the type of parent that will take the time to listen to the struggles and pressures that their children are facing at school or with their friends.  The proactive parent will take initiative to engage their children in open and honest conversation. 

To be honest, every parent struggles with the demands of time for work and family.  It is often difficult to find a good balance, but God commands us as parents to invest in our children which includes spending time with them.  My wife keeps a wooden display in her kitchen to remind her of this truth.  The message on the display reads, “The Best Thing To Spend On Children Is TIME.”  Children demand our love and attention, and this is accomplished only through the investment of time. 

On the other hand, a passive parent is one that shows little or no interest in the lives of their children.  There are plenty of distractions in the world that threaten to keep parents from spending time with their children.  Dr. Paul Chappell explains one of the serious consequences of passive parenting.  He explains:

“If you brush off their request for your time and attention when they’re small…they will not only develop resentment toward your instruction, but they will learn to live without your input.  When they are teens, you’ll want more than anything for them to open up and talk to you.  But they may not know how.

Your children are a gift from God; make time for them.  And I’m not talking about spending time watching television together—but actually living together.  Have family dinner.  Ask about their day…Work on a project.  Interface in one another’s lives.”  (page 12, Making Home Work.)

When it comes to influencing children, parents’ actions are important.  Children do what children see.  In my town, drinking alcohol and smoking cigarettes among young people are a real issue.  I am not aware of any programs in my town that address this issue, however I do know that it is a real issue.  Most of the young people that I’ve been able to counsel have struggled with this issue at some point in their lives starting as early as their pre-teen years. 

I am aware that there are several factors that are at play with this issue.  The influence of the media is a major contributor to the issue, however, I believe that the biggest cause of teen  alcoholism and other vices is because of what they see at home.  This issue is a generational problem because children tend to emulate their parents’ actions.

Godly parental influence is much needed in our society today.  One of the reasons for this is that there are truly sinister influences in the world that are doing their best to captivate the hearts of our children.  This makes parenting in the 21st century is even tougher than in the previous generations.  The sin is the same no matter what generation we live in, and as Solomon wisely said, “…there is no new thing  under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 1:9).  However, today’s parents combat the influence of the media. 

The media is the window to the world’s philosophies and enticements.  No parent in their right state of mind would ever allow an intruder to freely come in their homes to harm their children.  Yet, the television and personal devices are allowed to have constant access to infiltrate the minds of our children.  Just as we would secure our homes from unwanted visitors by putting bars on the windows, locking all the doors at night time, or installing security cameras in our homes, we must proactively watch over our children. 

Dr. Paul Chappell continues to say:

“You don’t have the opportunity to influence your child in a vacuum.  Not only are you working to shepherd their heart in personal maturity and spiritual growth, but at the same time, you’re having to ward off dangerous influences.  This calls for a level of intentionality in our influence.” (page 46, Making Home Work)

The type of parent you are will determine how your children will turn out.   There is no such thing as a perfect parent.  We have all made our share of mistakes, but do not let your past stop you from being the parent that you need to be.  As parents we need to protect one of the greatest gifts of God to mankind—children.  We need to protect them from the influences of world.  However, part of nurturing is to also to make sure that our children are under the proper influence.

It is true that the nurturing and admonishing of children is the parent’s primary responsibility.  However, God instituted another positive influence in the raising of children.  This is none other than the local church.  The church as the Bible describes it is, “the pillar and ground of truth” (1 Timothy 3:15).  The church is the one place that reinforces whatever Biblical truth that is already being taught in the home.  It is important to note that the church is not the replacement for the need of parental influence.  It is rather a place where children can learn more about God and be influenced by godly leaders.  Not allowing the church to fulfill its role of influence is a great disservice to our children.

              The time to influence our children is now.  We do not get the opportunity to turn the clock back.  We only have a limited time to influence, but God has provided us His Word to give us all the necessary tools to become the right kind of influence our children need. 

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Guardians of God’s Heritage

TRUTH FOR TODAY

Jun Malazo

"Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward."  (Psalms 127:3, KJV)

Children are treasures from God.  The word heritage is the Hebrew word nachălâh

(pronounced nakh-al-aw’) which literally means inheritance or possession.  If you are a parent, you have been given a tremendous treasure from God—your children.  And as a parent you have been given the privilege to train “God’s heritage” to follow God’s purpose for his or her life.

My wife and I have been privileged to be the parents of five children ages 17 to 2.  Each one of them has unique personality traits, and we thank God for each one of them.  We recognize the awesome responsibility that we have to nurture them.  We recognize both our physical and spiritual responsibilities toward each one of them. 

Sadly, our society in general does not value children as we should.  I found an interesting article regrading family structures in the Philippines.  According to the ABS-CBN News article posted on September 25, 2008, there are up to six million children left behind by OFW (Overseas Foreign Workers) parents.  The author, Aries Rufo said, “The government should rethink its policy of promoting labor migration as a way of generating employment opportunity, as it strikes adversely into the very foundation of society, which is the family.”           

The article highlights Vanessa Tobin, UNICEF (United Nation Children’s Fund) deputy director for programs, and her address in the International Conference on Gender, Migration and Development which was held in Manila concerning the implications of parents leaving behind families to work overseas.  She adds that the absence of parents creates, “. . .displacement, disruptions and changes in care-giving arrangement.”  This creates a dynamic change in children’s upbringing with far-reaching negative implications.

While many would argue that having an OFW parent creates better livelihood and better educational opportunities for children, Tobin argues otherwise.  The article continues:

Tobin cited studies where it was found that “there is not much improvement in the lives of the families, the money being sent is just enough or sometimes hardly meet the demands and needs of the families left behind.”

It is true that there are economic benefits to working overseas.  But according to the article studies have shown that children do not see provision of these benefits as a form of care.

The article continues to say:

Labor migration of parents also skews the values of children as they view it only in terms of ‘money equivalent.’ With no proper guidance from the parents, the regular remittances lead to materialistic attitudes of children.

This not only creates a materialistic attitude, but it also harbors an unhealthy self-entitlement outlook of children which will not be good for their social development.  The article adds that, “Children of migrants are also vulnerable to abuse and violence with the parent’s absence.”

Additionally, Tobin closes by saying:

“The prevailing separation of one or both parents from their children definitely goes against the interest of the children. It is therefore imperative to determine how these remittances are utilized to find ways to increase the positive effect of remittances on these rights and promote their best use.”

This article gives us a sad but true picture of the devaluing of the importance of family unity in our society today.  Sadly, the children whom God has entrusted to parents suffer the most effect of the absence of parents.  Children need their parents to fulfill their God-given role.  Simply put, parents cannot fulfill this by being physically absent.  Just exactly what are these responsibilities?

"And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."  (Ephesians 6:4, KJV)

"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."  (Proverbs 22:6, KJV)

"And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes."  (Deuteronomy 6:6-8, KJV)"He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."  (Proverbs 13:24, KJV)

The above verses are plain and self-explanatory.  But more importantly, these roles cannot possibly be fulfilled by parents that are not physically present with their families.  Your role as a parent cannot be outsourced or fulfilled by proxy.  Nor can your physical guidance be replaced by your monthly remittances. 

Paul Chappell in his book entitled “Making Home Work In a Broken Society” said:

“As parents, we are to give attention to the upbringing of our children.  We are to shape their hearts, lives, and consciences.

As the guardians of God’s heritage, our job is not to change who God made our children to be, but to shape and direct their lives toward the purposes God has for them.  We are to provide protection that nurtures and develops them….so when the time comes…they have  a solid foundation and a straight direction.”

In closing, delinquent children are often a result of delinquent parenting or the complete lack thereof.  As guardians of God’s heritage we must treasure each of our children.  We are not here simply to make sure they have food, shelter, and clothing.  We are here to love and to develop them to become responsible adults who serve and love God.

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The difference between love and lust

TRUTH FOR TODAY

Jun Malazo

The highlight of the month of February is Valentine’s Day.  Stores and malls are decorated in such a way to remind people to get someone they love a special gift or to plan a special occasion.  Television stations air reruns of old love-story movies while advertisers take advantage of love-crazed people, bombarding their minds with commercials.

We live in a world that is hungry for love.  Love is a God-given emotion.  Our need to love and to be loved has been placed in the very fibre of our being by God Himself.  Unfortunately, because of the influence of popular cultural trends, many have a wrong view of what love really is.  In their endeavor to find love they end up with dissatisfaction and disappointment.

Media and celebrity lifestyle also does not help.  Often our society idolizes the lives of celebrities which portray an even more distorted and unrealistic view of love.  In turn, the line between love and lust often gets distorted.  God created love and it is meant to be beautiful, but just like anything God creates, Satan corrupts and distorts it.  In this article we will see the difference between love and lust.

First of all, we need to understand that God is the author of love.  1 John 4:8 says, “He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love."  Not only did God create love, He also gave a model to know what love truly is.  Notice the following passage of Scripture:

"Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things."  (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, KJV)

The word love appears in different forms in the original language of the Bible.  Three that are often used are eros, phileo, and agape.  The word eros is love of the body.  This is the word we get the English form of erotica which is a lustful type of attraction.  The word phileo speaks of a brotherly love.  Lastly, the word agape speaks of God’s love which is the highest form of love.  It is an unselfish and unconditional type of love.

It is this highest form of love that the Apostle Paul used when he wrote about charity in the above verses.  Notice several descriptions of what charity love looks like.  Paul says that it is unselfish and unconditional. He adds that it is kind, meaning that it is gentle.  This type of love does not seek its own agenda and does not seek to elevate itself.  Lastly, this kind of love is enduring, meaning that it will stand the test of time.

This type of love is the polar opposite of the the type of love that our world exemplifies.  While the world may call it love, we can refer to it as lust because it seeks to gratify self.  We live in a world that teaches young people to gratify their selfish desires.  When I was in high school, the motto was “If it feels good, just do it,” or “Why not do it, everybody else is!”  I believe the same is still practiced today.  This gives us a false view of what love is because it only leads to shame and dissatisfaction.

The following is an excerpt from a book entitled, “Just Friends” coauthored by Cary Schmidt and Mike Ray. The list gives us a brief picture of the difference between love and lust.

Lust is physical while love is spiritual.  Lust is fed by touching, but love is fed by selflessness.  Love is better—it majors on the spiritual side of a relationship. 

Lust is temporal while love is eternal.  Amnon in 2 Samuel 12 said, he “loved” his half-sister, Tamar.  Notice in verse 14 and 15: “Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her.  Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her.  And Amnon said unto to her, Arise, be gone.” Amnon said he loved Tamar, but he did not.  It was lust which soon became hatred.  Likewise, Samson’s immoral relationships were temporal—lust not love.  Love is better—it lasts forever.

Lust is selfish while love cares for others.  Lust is pure selfishness. It’s a man’s effort to please himself.  Lust cares not how the other person feels.  Lust only wants to fulfill its natural desires.  Love is better—it cares for others.

Lust brings guilt while love protects a clear conscience.  After lust there is always shame and remorse because of the sin.  Love is better—it brings no guilt.

Lust says “hurry up” while love says “wait on God.”  Lust happens quickly, but real love takes time to grow.  When Jacob worked for fourteen years to marry Rachel, the Scripture says in Genesis 29:20, “…and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.”  Lust must be satisfied now.  Love is better—it helps you wait.

Lust sees no fault; love forgives fault.  Lust causes you to think another person is perfect—setting you up for disappointment.  Love is not blind; lust is.  Love does see weaknesses, but it continues to love.  Love is better—it loves you the way you are. 

Lust thrives on fantasy; love is based upon truth.  Lust idolizes and worships another based upon image that isn’t real.  Love is better—it is real. 

Lust fades over time, and love grows over time.  Lust is like a shooting star which is bright for a while and then fades away.  Have you ever felt like “the better I get to know a certain person, the less I like them”?  That is not love.  Love intensifies with time.  Infatuation and lust wears off.  Love is better—it grows.

Lust always destroys, but love builds.  Lust gradually dismantles your life—like taking a building apart one brick and one board at a time.  But love always builds your life and makes you a better person in God’s grace.  Love is better—it builds.

Schmidt adds, “Lust will take you down a selfish, temporary path of danger.  Love will cause you to always do what is spiritually best for you and the other person.” 

Perhaps one of the most striking things about the difference between love and lust is the fact that one is permanent and the other temporal.  One finds satisfaction in love while lust always makes one never to be satisfied and to want something else better. 

Love, as God ordained it, is meant to be kind, unselfish and unconditional.  This can be attained if one follows God’s direction for love.  We do not have to fall into what the world offers.  We can make the right the decision to choose love.

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Can Science and the Bible agree?

TRUTH FOR TODAY

Jun Malazo

The popular opinion in the scientific community is that science does not, nor will it ever, agree with the Bible.  This idea was birthed from the basis that science is based on fact, and that the Bible is based on faith.  While there are some that say the Bible and science cannot agree, I want to propose that the two actually do.  Someone said, “Science and the Bible are two different ways of looking at the world.  One is mainly concerned with spiritual matters; the other on physical matters.  But on occasion the two overlap.  When they do, there is no conflict.” Sir Isaac Newton also said, “Don’t doubt the Creator because it is inconceivable that accidents alone could be the controller of this universe.”

Author John Hudson Tiner suggests that there are a number of reasons why some believe these two ways of looking at the world can never harmonize.  One is the fact that the Bible does not use modern day scientific terminologies.  This is due to the fact that the Bible was written before the beginning of science.  Rather, the Bible uses everyday language common to man. Tiner explains the following:

“As an example of this, a scientist would say that rain is caused by condensation of moisture from the aqueous vapor in the atmosphere.  Gravity causes the liquid to fall to the earth.

The Bible, on the other hand, describes rain this way:  ‘All the rivers run into the sea; yet the sea is not full; unto the place from whence the rivers come, thither they return again.’  (Ecclesiastes 1:7, KJV)

The Bible description is good science.  That is exactly how it happens.  No matter how the language is changed to put the statement into scientific terms, the Bible account is one of the briefest, most concise, and accurate descriptions of the water cycle.  No scientist could improve on it in as few words.”

Another reason for believing that the Bible and science cannot agree is the fact that some words have multiple meanings.  This causes people to misunderstand the Bible.  Instead of investigating further, they accept science as fact.

Tiner adds, “The most disturbing reason for differences between science and the Bible is due to some scientists (but not all, by any means) who seem to get a special delight out of attempting to make the Bible appear inaccurate about scientific matters.”

We need to recognize that scientists are not inerrant. History shows us over and over again wrong observations that were made by prominent scientists.  Many scientific discoveries and observations of the past have been proven wrong over time.  Whereas, the Bible has been tested and proven accurate for thousands of years. 

The Bible has been accused of being a book of outdated superstitions written by people who do not understand how the natural world works.  This claim cannot be further from the truth.  In fact, the Bible contains many scientific facts that were written thousands of years before the scientific community discovered them.

For instance, today we know the vital importance of blood to the life of our bodies.  According to Medical News Today, “Blood has a number of functions that are central to survival, including: supplying oxygen to cells and tissues, providing essential nutrients to cells, such as amino acids, fatty acids, and glucose, and removing waste materials, such as carbon dioxide, urea, and lactic acid.”

Without blood we cannot survive.  However, this fact was not known in the past and caused many scientists to make tragic mistakes.  In the nineteenth century doctors believed that harmful vapors entered the blood causing many sicknesses.  For this cause, doctors would literally drain blood from patients by cutting veins and arteries on their patients’ arms.  One such tragic event was when the first president of the United States, George Washington, came down with a cold and his doctor ordered for his blood to be drained.  George Washington was literally bled to his death.  The British Columbia Medical Journal indicates that it wasn’t until the late nineteenth century that blood-letting was discredited as a treatment for diseases.

How is this related to the Bible?  The Bible has always viewed blood as essential to life even thousands of years before the lethal practice of blood-letting was introduced.  Notice the following verse in Leviticus 17:11:

"For the life of the flesh is in the blood: and I have given it to you upon the altar to make an atonement for your souls: for it is the blood that maketh an atonement for the soul."  (Leviticus 17:11, KJV)

Additionally, the Bible says in Leviticus 17:14 that, “. . .for the life of all flesh is in the blood thereof.”

Another scientific concept is the understanding of germs.  In 1847, one of every six women who gave birth in a hospital died.  The scientific medical community was amazed at such a high rate of death.  It was discovered that it was a common practice among doctors during this time to wash their hands without any germ-killing agents.  They would reuse towels and other instruments without proper sanitation.  Also, doctors would perform autopsies and then examine live patients unaware that they were passing germs from one place to another.

When the practice of proper hand washing was implemented, the doctors were amazed that the death rate plummeted from 18% to only 2%.  The scientific community celebrated their amazing new discovery.  However, was it really a new discovery or is it possible that the doctors just rediscovered what had already been known for centuries? 

Thousands of years before, the Bible told us:

"He that toucheth the dead body of any man shall be unclean seven days. He shall purify himself with it on the third day, and on the seventh day he shall be clean: but if he purify not himself the third day, then the seventh day he shall not be clean."  (Numbers 19:11-12, KJV)

There are many more scientific discoveries that confirm the Bible.  For centuries people thought that the earth was flat until Ferdinand Magellan circumnavigated the world in the 1500’s.  But Isaiah wrote in 700 BC, "It is he that sitteth upon the circle of the earth, and the inhabitants thereof are as grasshoppers; that stretcheth out the heavens as a curtain, and spreadeth them out as a tent to dwell in:"  (Isaiah 40:22, KJV)

Today scientists claim that the earth hangs upon nothing and is suspended in space due to gravity.  They credit this discovery to a mathematician and physicist named Isaac Newton in 1687.  He realized that some force was acting on falling objects.  He learned that the moon was circling the earth, and it would move away in a straight line if were not for some force.  Later Newton would published what is known as his three laws of motion and developed mathematical proof of elliptical planetary orbits.  He called this force “gravity” and determined that gravitational forces exist between all objects orbiting around the sun.

About 3200 years before Newton’s discoveries the Bible says:

"He stretcheth out the north over the empty place, and hangeth the earth upon nothing."  (Job 26:7, KJV)

Kyle Butt of Evidence for God’s Word said, “The Bible never gets a simple medical fact wrong, and exhibits a knowledge of scientific facts thousands of years ahead of its time.  This proves that the Bible is of divine origin.”

In closing, the Bible is not primarily a scientific book.  It is a book designed to reveal God to mankind.  Science can agree with the Bible because scientific discoveries have confirmed the Bible.  In the words of the famous physicist, Albert Einstein, I quote, “The more I study science the more I believe in God.”

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